Slacker Blogger!
So, it is about 1am my time and this is the third time I have sat here making an attempt to write this blog. I have a great post in mind about a boutique owner who really inspires me so why can't I write? I have no clue but I think that my slacker blogger problem comes from the thousands of other things going on in my life. So, I am going to dig deep and try to find the motivation to to do that post tomorrow. Today, I have some questions for those of you out there reading this who are willing to answer? If you all would like to answer the questions as annonymous you can but I would love to get some feedback.
So, here come the questions...
Do you find it incredibly hard to balance being a mom and maintaining a sense of self?
I do that is why I am asking. I feel like I can no longer be greedy or put myself first. There are so many things I need to do for myself that will in turn provide for my children but I can't find the time to always do them in because I am taking care of the children! So, I work late into the morning hours to just be able to get anything done.
Next question...
How many of you out there do this too? Spend all day taking care of the kids, house and everything else and then do your work after they are all asleep?
Do you feel burnt out?
I do. I really am the type of person that likes to throw myself into things and do them at 100%. With having so much to do I feel like I have to constantly juggle and the juggling has me burnt out. I'd love to concentrate on one thing and not feel guilty for neglecting anything else.
Last question...
Do you ever feel like you are the only one who can't hang at this being a "SuperMom" bulls**t?
Pardon my French but it has to be bull because I have yet to meet one woman who truly is a SuperMom! I know plenty of inspiring, awesome, spectacular women but I have yet to meet a true SuperMom who is doing it all alone! So, why is it we are sold that picture everyday that we have to be able to just handle it all? Many of the moms I know who are running businesses from home either have all the kids in school or send their children to daycare at least half the day. The ones who are trying to run a business and take care of the children full time, at least the ones I talk to, are having a hard time balancing it all. We feel immense guilt and lots of frustration because something always seem to give. I just can't seem to manage getting all the things I want going. SO, yes I am airing out my frustration with myself here. Just want to know if anyone else feels the same way!
So, I am wondering if I should give up on some of my aspirations most of the time. I love my boys and want to homeschool them especially my eldest. It is so hard getting him motivated and keeping him going when I turn my back. I can't hold his hand for everything, not that he needs it, he just seems to want attention all the time. My middle son is having a terrible time potty training and seems to poop just after I sat him on the potty or when I am busy breastfeeding the baby. Then the baby wants to be attached to the breast all night and all day. I know they should always come first but I really want more for me. I want to start learning more, doing more and I especially want a career again but one I can do from home.
So, if you are a SuperMom and you read this and think that I am a complete fool let me know what the secret is. If you tell me that the secret is having your life straight before having kids then I am totally screwed because my life looks like Lombard St in San Francisco and I already have the three boys.
I promise to Blog 2you tomorrow!
posted by AnainBjorkquist at 10:07 PM
4 Comments:
I completely relate as I sit here trying to work while downing 2 cups of coffee before my kids wake from their naps. I don't believe anyone is Supermom. And if they say they are, they are lying through their teeth! Being a mom in itself is hard enough and then trying to run a business at home! It is tough! I look forward to hearing what other boutique owner moms do to balance it. I try to do as much as I can while my kids nap ( I have a 1 year old and a 3 year old). My son is in preschool so I get a bit of a break there, but my daughter is always underfoot. I definitely get frustrated because I want my business to grow faster, but I can only do so much. That is why internet businesses are great- you can work at your own pace (somewhat!). I try to reserve the hour before bed as "me" time and I get up about an hour before my kids in the morning to work. And yes, I feel burnt out at least one day a week, every week. So you are not alone!! Hang in there!
Hi, I often feel the way you do. I have so many dreams and aspirations, particularly in the business field. I have ideas on how to grow my business, know I need to educate myself more in business and computers, and I just can't do it all from 9PM - 2 AM each night while the family sleeps.
I struggle with balancing business and life daily. Don't even get me started on the housework and grocery shopping...
I do know that I am not the best mom I can be when I am walking around like a zombie all day long. I have committed to getting to bed by 12:30 and taking an evening off every once and again. This keeps me more rested and a better person to be around. I hate being cranky even more than my kids hate me being cranky.
I am learning that my kids grow way too fast for me to be going through their early years in a "lack of sleep" fog. For now, I will get done what I can and keep a log of "to do" ideas. I'll pick away at it slowly.
I have one supermom tip. Just be the best mom you can be. Your family is the most important thing in your life. Make them the priority.
I think all moms struggle with trying to do it all. Balance is exactly as it is defined - even distribution of time, work... everything. Where do you think the phrase "hanging in the balance" came from. It is a mom's uncertainty as to when she can do everything that needs to be done. Others need to do their part and some things just don't get done. Like my nails for instance. I would love to have the beautiful nails others seem to have, but I guess that is one area that deep down I've chosen to let go. I think we are always burnt out, some days more than others. I am in a state of tiredness at all times. I often wonder how my mom did it all those years ago. I am the youngest of seven. (and we're not even Catholic.) I am truelly amazed at what women can accomplish these days. You go Girl!
I know exactly how you feel. It's not easy trying to maintain so many important roles, such as Mom, Wife, Small Business owner and Woman.
Although for the past 4 months my husband has been home helping, it wasn't always this way and it really isn't any easier. I've got 4 children. My 2 oldest just started Kindergarten, my 1 yr old and autistic 2 yr old are with me 24/7.
Our business is our only source of income, so we have to work during the day and into the evenings. I work 12-16 hour days, 6 days a week. I sleep an average of 3-4 hours per night. I spend my nights feeling guilty for not having one on one time with each child daily.
I forget what it feels like to be a woman. My hair has been in a pony tail for months, make up doesn't exist and I don't even have time to shave my legs most weeks. I feel like a zombie on a daily basis, just walking around going through the motions.
Although my children are home, I miss them and long for quality time with them. I feel guilty all day, every day. I often feel myself slipping back into depression and don't really know how to pull myself out of it.
I often consider giving up. I think if we just go back to work, my children will get the attention they deserve and I can finally find some peace within myself. But then I remember.... No one else can love my children like I do. No one else can console them like I do. No one else can make them feel like I do.
So, I'll just keep tugging along, dreaming of that day where life is perfect. Where there's enough hours in the day to get things done and enjoy life. Where Life doesn't have to be so hard and I can finally step back and enjoy my children.
So, how do I do it? I don't. I'm not a supermom. I'm the best mom that I can be. I'm a small business owner. And in 20 years, I'll have time to shave my legs.
But you know what? I wouldn't trade it for anything. I love my children. I love being a mother. I love spending my days with them, even if it's not the way I had hoped. My kids love me and they know I am doing the best that I can.
Post a Comment
<< Home